GIRL FRIENDSHIPS ; When Girls Unite For A Better Purpose.

How many girlfriends do you have? Five? Twenty? One hundred?
How many of them are close enough that you can trust them with anything?
How many of them consistently encourage you and build you up?
While it’s easy to gain a huge number of “friends” on social media, we all need more than just a few passing acquaintances who fill our newsfeed with funny cat/dog pictures or pictures of adorable babies....Cheeeiiiii, babies (IG Chronicles 😝 )

Perhaps you've heard people say that "Girl-friendships can never last long, in fact it hardly gets to even a year. Girls just can't trust each other.  There's one who always spoils the whole thing.  Someone will try to make passes at the others boyfriend or husband. Someone will always feel jealous of the other,  someone will always be backbiting the other "....  Blah blah blah (or is it brah brah brah 🙈 For those who happen to come from where I come from or anywhere near, the latter is allowed. There's no big difference in our pronunciation of R and L, chinda ya matamchi is real 😹😂)
It's said that approximately 5 out 10 ladies will probably attest to the end of many girl-friendships at one point or another in life.  
I remember way back in primary and high school, most girls were so vocal about the fact that they preferred to have a guy for a best friend. Reason being?  Girls will always mess friendships.
Men seem to know how to maintain their friendships. For them it's something between long-lasting and lifelong friendships. Probably we girls should borrow a few tips from them on how to go about our girl-friendships precisely on how to sustain them,  just saying.
All in all,  even with the existing statistics and facts or should we say propaganda, I believe that we girls can build and maintain strong and lifelong friendships with each other. I live for the day that as girls we will resolve to be united for a lifetime and for a better purpose other than gossip, competition, boyfriend/husband snatching, etc
I know making new friends isn't something all of us like to do. But we have to be intentional, so intentional about it. If you're like me, you probably adore the 'Me Time ', enjoying your own company,  spending time indoors,  reading books, listening to music or just hanging out with you 😁 Being in crowds of people, especially new people, tends to drain your energy, a lot!  Throughout, you look forward to getting back to your house/space. To go and get recharged.
To be honest, of late, I've become a little outgoing. (When I was in first and second year in Campus, I spent most of the weekends indoors. Yaaani hadi at times my immediate neighbor wasn't sure if am in or out. So when am locking the door on Sunday morning on my way to church, she would say something like "Haiya Kumbe ulikuwa huku?  I thought ulienda home" #Chronicles of an #Introvert #Melancholic)
By the way, I realised that making friends requires us to step out in faith. I'd gladly say it here that as of today, I enjoy making new friends, girlfriends, in this context. Of course this temperament thing checks in time and again but I have to remind myself that am not an island. I need people and there are people who need me as well. I know the extent of impact that meaningful girl-friendships can have in one's life.  I've grown in leaps and bounds, spiritually, socially, emotionally, intellectually... Just because I chose to be  intentional about making, building and sustaining friendships with my fellow girls.
If I may put my two cents in, here's why I find it important to make, build and maintain girl friendships. Automatically, it will be a huge PLUS if those girlfriends are Godly.

They're Your Accountability System

Being a Godly woman isn’t easy, and we all mess up sometimes. Thankfully, Godly girlfriends keep us accountable. They ask the tough questions to see what you are struggling with, and then they follow up consistently to see how you are doing. They don’t do this to judge or belittle us, but because they truly care about us and helping us be an amazing Godly woman too.
I know in this century we are so obsessed with "It's my life" kind of attitude.
Yeah. Of course. It's your life!
But that doesn't mean we should live carelessly, just because it's our lives. There are many lives out there that we influence, based on how we live. Whether we know it or not.
Having accountability partners doesn't mean that you're weak, or don't have your act together and therefore you're in dire need of help or rather round the clock kind of monitoring. No. Not at all. Realizing the importance of accountability and acting on it, ensures that you keep your character in check.  By inviting another lady/ladies into our life, we ensure that we have a great support system. 
In the times we are acting in our foolishness, they'll rebuke us in love, and help us find our way back (some tough love, you know.)
James 5:16 ~ Therefore, confess your sins to one another...

They Will Encourage You

Whether you are having a good day or a bad day, your Godly girlfriends are always there to encourage you. They won’t let you wallow in self-pity indefinitely. Instead, they help you remember how valuable you are and that God has everything under control and that it WILL be okay, even if it doesn’t seem like it at the moment. They are full of encouraging thoughts, they genuinely care, and they have a wealth of Scripture verses that somehow really do make you feel better and be better.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 ~ Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

They Ask The Difficult Questions

When you are really struggling and a friend asks you how you are doing, it can be tempting to just say “fine.” (I've used this line a couple of times 🙈 But I rarely get away with it 😟 )
However, Godly girlfriends don’t let you get away this. They ask the difficult questions to find out how you REALLY are, how they can help you and how they can pray for you. Whether you are struggling with depression or struggling to stay faithful to your spouse, your closest Godly girlfriends want to know what’s really going on so they can be there for you.
They provide that secure environment where can we can confide in them, expose dem skeletons in our closets. Share our deepest and scariest struggles. Those that we'd gladly take to the grave with us, yes, gladly.
Proverbs 27:6 ~ Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.

They Offer Wise and Godly Counsel

Counsel/Advice is very easy to come by these days. Uncle Google actually made it easier. From the comfort of your duvet, you can get 1,000,000 solutions to a single question. When you turn to your friends, they have 1000 opinions, many of which directly oppose the others. Godly girlfriends give you advice you can trust, sound and non- conflicting advice. Their advice is based on Scripture and given with your unique circumstances and personality in mind. They won’t just tell you what you want to hear. They'll tell you what you NEED to hear(And most often than not, we don't like those truths when they are being handed to us.) They’ll help you figure out what God would actually want you to do in your situation. How cool is that? 
Proverbs 27:17 ~Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

They Pray For and With You

How special does it feel when a girlfriend calls you up and goes like, "How can I pray with you today or this week?" You can probably agree with me that it's one of the most special highlights of the day/week.
We'd all like to have people who go on their knees and pray for us. We can pray for ourselves but additional prayers made no one less spiritual. Whether we are sick, unsure about a decision, we just received big news or are feeling overwhelmed, Godly girlfriends are the perfect people to pray for you and they are always happy to do it. They won’t just say “I’ll pray for you,” and then forget. They will pray WITH you, and then they’ll go home and pray some more.
James 5:16 ~ ...and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

They Have The Resources You Need

None of us has all of the answers, all resources. Thankfully, when we band together, we are much stronger together than we are individually. Not only do Godly girlfriends offer the advice, accountability and prayers that you need, but they can connect you with other resources you need as well. 
Need a job?
Want to know the coolest hangout joint in town?
Need an out of this world face beat? Need a ride to church this Sunday?
Have a question about the Bible and you don’t know where to find the answer? Need some encouragement for the journey?
Need some good books to read?
Godly friends either have just what you need or they can connect you with other people who can help you find it.

They Will Be Out To Have Fun With You

Living for God doesn't translate to living a boring or "Woiiyee" kind of life.
Who wants to spend this life looking like they had their breathe snuffed out of them since the day they were introduced to Jesus?
You can have fun moments with the girls,  allow yourselves to be rejuvenated.
Go to the movies. Grab some Ice-cream. Have a thrilling nature trail, deep into the woods. Sit under a tree and laugh, laugh about anything and everything (till you snort 😂) Psst! Don't tell anyone,  but yes that's how you can actually get to know that you had a good laugh.
Plan for girls-night-in , open your homes to each other,  cook meals and enjoy eating together, play games, try coming up with nicknames for each other.
In short have fun and create memories.
😊😊😊

...“A woman will always be my best friend. I’ll never have a best friend who is a man. It just doesn’t work that way. So many times young girls will be like, ‘I’m a guy’s girl. ’ And I’m like, ‘No, you’re not. There’s no way a man can understand you like a woman, and you’re a guy’s girl because you’re threatened by other women. ' I was like that. I was only men. But that’s because I felt special around men, and with a woman I can really be put in my place, and I’m on the same level as them. That’s the way it’s changed, is that I love women now, and I didn’t before. Because I was scared of them, because they understood me. "  Jemima Kirke